Assertions of individuality are natural, but the thought of oneness minimizes them. The machine requires some lubricating oil to avoid friction, at least to minimize the same. The common ideal brings people of heterogeneous characteristics together with some design. They keep the ideal before their eyes and the conflicts are minimized. Everybody strives to take a charitable view of the small incidents. Motives are not imputed and misunderstandings are removed there and then.
Every utterance has a two fold meaning. One is direct (Vachyartha) and the other implied (Lakshyartha or Bhavartha). The sentiment or the spirit behind an utterance is to be understood and not always the direct meaning. Here Eknathji explains it with the example from Ramayana. When Rama was hunting for the golden deer, Maricha raised a cry of alarm and Sita insisted on Lakshmana going to the help of Rama. Lakshmana was sure that that was a ruse and he refused to leave his post. Thereupon, Sita rebuked and insulted him and imputed unworthy motives to Lakshmana's refusal. But wise as he was, he did not take them literally but understood that Sita was much perturbed at Rama's cry and that she wanted him to go to his brother's rescue. Harsh words are weighed in their proper perspective in a cultured family. If there is a determination to live in a family as a family, then normal frictions are no frictions. A bloated ego and a false sense of prestige are winked at. It is the human element of false ego that causes feuds. If there is mutual understanding, two in-compatible and diametrically different people can stay in one room happily without friction.